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Navigating Daily Stressors: A Guide to Completing the Stress Cycle

Writer's picture: Braelyn BishopBraelyn Bishop

We all encounter stressors in our daily lives. These are the events that present a real or perceived threat and activate a stress response in our bodies, such as work, family, discrimination, cultural norms, self-criticism, and traumatic events. The resulting stress is a physiological, neurological, and evolutionary response that is meant to elicit a response to the stressors. A simple example of this is when we experience a threatening or scary situation (e.g., running into a grizzly bear); our body mobilizes us to fight, flee, or freeze to keep us safe until the danger has passed. 

In modern life, we rarely run into bears (unless you are an avid hiker), and the “threats” we encounter can be harder to identify and often never actually pass. Maybe your boss has difficult-to-define and ever-changing expectations for you, or perhaps you experience criticism in your parenting from someone who is supposed to be a support. Whatever the stressor may be, your brain sends a ‘danger’ signal that asks your body to respond. When you successfully run away from the bear, your brain recognizes that the threat has passed, and you are no longer in danger. You shake it off, let out a sign of relief, maybe you laugh or cry, you get the heck out of there, and your nervous system returns to its normal, calm state – the stress cycle gets completed.  

While you can attempt to fight or run from a bear, it is not socially acceptable to fight your boss or run from your parenting responsibilities. The responses you have available to you are pretty limited and you, like most of us, probably end up temporarily distracting yourself from the stressor by scrolling social media, binge-watching shows, snacking, throwing yourself into more work, or numbing out with a drink or two. While these coping strategies offer temporary relief form the stressors in your life, they do nothing to address the stress in your body – the stress cycle does not complete, and you end up in a state of perpetual or chronic stress. 

Chronic stress can increase the risk of heart disease, high blood pressure, diabetes, depression, anxiety, and other illnesses so it is essential that we find ways to complete the stress cycle. When we can resolve the physiological activation and release the stress held in our bodies, we have more access to our insight, wisdom, and problem-solving abilities to effectively respond to our stressors. 

Ways to Complete the Stress Cycle: 

  1. Physical Activity: Walking, running, biking, hiking, gardening, cleaning, dancing, or kickboxing—anything that gets you moving your big muscle groups. 

  2. Why: Stress hormones and adrenaline are metabolized. 

  3. Breathing: Deep, slow breaths. Consider a simple exercise called “box breathing” where you inhale for a count of four, pause for four, exhale for four, and pause for four again. (Here are some additional breathing exercises to try.) 

  4. Why: Deep, slow breathing downregulates the nervous system. 

  5. Positive Social Interaction: Go for coffee with a friend, call a loved one, or say hello to a store clerk or neighbor. 

  6. Why: Reminds us that others are trustworthy and low threat, increasing a sense of safety. 

  7. Laughter: Watch a funny movie, comedian, or reel. Reminisce about funny memories with a friend or family member. 

  8. Why: Creates a sense of safety and ease and helps regulate emotions. 

  9. Affection: Spend time with your pet, engage in a 20-second hug, or give yourself some comforting touch or massage 

  10. Why: Creates a sense of safety and connection and releases oxytocin (the “love hormone”). 

  11. Crying: Let the tears come without judgment for the “why.” Bring kind and gentle attention to the experience. 

  12. Why: Helps the body release built-up stress hormones and promotes emotional balance by activating the calming parasympathetic nervous system. 

  13. Creativity: Paint, write, draw, craft, or cook. 

  14. Why: Provides an avenue to express, externalize, and integrate emotions. 

 

For additional learning on this topic, I recommend Burnout: The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle by Emily and Amelia Nagoski. The authors also participated in a podcast episode with Brené Brown that you can find online. 

If you are looking to learn more or would like someone to guide you through recognizing and responding to the stress cycle, consider seeking the support of a therapist. 

 

References 

Nagoski, E., & Nagoski, A. (2020). Burnout: The secret to unlocking the stress cycle. Ballantine Books.  

Sussex Publishers. (n.d.). What 20 seconds of hugging can do for you. Psychology Today. https://www.psychologytoday.com/ca/blog/keep-it-in-mind/202201/what-20-seconds-hugging-can-do-you  

Altomare, A. (2022, October 5). Completing the stress cycle. UBC Human Resources. https://hr.ubc.ca/working-ubc/news/october-10-2022/completing-stress-cycle  

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